If you have an anxious attachment style, dating can feel like an emotional rollercoaster. One moment, you’re feeling hopeful and excited about a new connection, and the next, you’re overanalyzing a text message, wondering if you said something wrong. You might find yourself craving reassurance, worrying about how much someone likes you, or feeling intense emotional highs and lows depending on how a relationship is going.

Have you ever found yourself sabotaging something you care deeply about? Maybe you procrastinate on an important project, shy away from a promising opportunity, or push people away when relationships get too close. On the surface, this behavior seems baffling—why would we stand in the way of our own happiness or success?